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Zen Under Fire by Marianne Elliott

Zen Under Fire by Marianne Elliott

In her remarkable memoir “Zen Under Fire”, Marianne Elliott recounts the story of her time in Afghanistan with the U.N., her struggle to help the people of that war-torn country and to find balance amid the turmoil, both political and personal.

“Recounts”, though, seems the wrong word for what Elliott does.  Told in the present tense, Elliott doesn’t seem to remember this time of her life in her memoir as much as re-live it, leading her readers alongside her:

“…the phone rings again; it’s a journalist from Reuters. Word of Amanullah Khan’s murder and the reprisal of the attacks is spreading. ‘How many dead?’ he asks. ‘We are hearing anything from forty to a hundred and forty.’ No one seems to know, least of all me.”

The effect is an immediacy, an urgency, in the of telling her story that engages the reader and keeps them transfixed.  The reader shadows Elliott through upheavals both public and personal and the restoration of what passes for peace and calm in a country ravaged by conflict.  When outward order returns, though, Elliott’s inward odyssey begins.  She describes coping with the stresses and sadnesses of work, life and love in Afghanistan with disarming honesty and vulnerability:

“I try to stop crying, but it only results in dramatic intakes of breath followed by renewed sobbing. It is the first time I have cried since the day of Amanullah Khan’s murder, and now that I’ve started there seems to be no stopping it.”

Images of water recur throughout the memoir, lending lyricism to her narrative: as the tears over public and private losses, as an internal vessel that threatens to overflow with overwhelming emotions, as a literal oasis that feeds a parched countryside and as the metaphorical sustenance able to revive a waning spirit.

Elliott turns to yoga and meditation and finds in these practices a calm mindfulness that serves her as she seeks to serve others:

“It is transforming my ability to be in the presence of profound suffering without closing my heart or leaping too quickly into action. As I learn to sit with other people’s pain, I also learn to sit with my own.” 

Elliott writes, “What brought me to Afghanistan in the first place was my belief in the possibility of a safer, fairer world, and in my ability to play a role in bringing that world about.”  “Zen Under Fire” draws its readers into a compelling and deeply personal tale of the human impact of war and the toll that humanitarian work takes on the lives of those who choose to work on behalf of the greater good.

Elliott’s memoir is a suspenseful wartime drama, a meditation on the human condition, but above all an affirmation of the power of compassion to heal the world and heal each one of us.  “Zen Under Fire” is a must-read story for anyone seeking perspective on how to find love and peace in a world – or a life – in conflict.

“Zen Under Fire” is released in North America on June 4th.  Marianne Elliott is touring the US and Canada, speaking and signing.  You can find a list of her events here.

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I met Marianne at the Creative Joy 2012 retreat, where she taught amazing sessions of gentle yoga.  Marianne is returning to Creative Joy 2013 to co-facilitate again with Jennifer Louden (writing) and Tracey Clark (photography).  Held at the beautiful Garrison Institute overlooking the Hudson River, the Creative Joy retreat is a wonderful way to reconnect with or recommit to your creative spirit.

I’m also a two-time alum of Marianne’s 30 Days of Yoga program.  If you’re looking to start a home yoga practice that “meets your body where it is”, look no further!